Raj Girn: Hi everyone! Welcome to another exciting episode of the ‘Transform Your Confidence’ podcast, the show where we bring you into real conversations with thought leaders, change makers and experts who are transforming the way we think about confidence, leadership, and of course, the big one, self-worth.
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In today’s show, we will be focusing on Leadership & Advocacy with the theme of “The Truth Within The Lie That We Tell Ourselves”
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In today’s show, we will be focusing on Leadership & Advocacy with the theme of “The Truth Within The Lie That We Tell Ourselves”
My guest today is Dana Grant, an international master life and business coach, the best-selling author of the book that I just said. But let me give you the full title, ‘The Truth Within the Lie: How to Align with Universal Principles to Create the Life You Deserve.’ She’s also the co-founder of the multi-million dollar brand Cali’Flour Foods and the host of her very own show, The Dana Grant Show.
From battling illness and addiction to building an empire rooted in soul alignment, Dana has made it her life’s work to ignite the inner potential to every person she meets. And I couldn’t be more thrilled to have her on today’s show to talk about this.
Welcome to the show, Dana. I am so glad to be having this conversation with you. I just have to tell you that I love your energy. I love your mission, and I want to dive right in.
Dana Grant: Oh, thank you. Thank you for having me. I feel the same. I’m so happy and excited for this conversation.
So, let’s go right into it. I wanna just go right there immediately. Let’s start at the beginning. What was the turning point that led you from illness to addiction to where you are now living in full alignment with your truth? A big question. I’m sure there’s a big answer. I want to throw it to you.
Okay, well, yeah, no one goes right there. So, I love that question because you know, it really starts at the transformational stage when I made the decision to, I was literally taking 20,000 milligrams of Demerol injectable a month at home. And I was in my kitchen with another script, and that’s enough—that’s enough to kill an elephant. And I was standing there and I thought, I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die. Now the doctors never cut me off. They never said you’re taking too much, but I was saturated.
I didn’t know what end was up, but the pendulum was swinging wide and hard. You know, I had debilitating migraines off the cuff. I was working with some of the best neurologists in the world. And I tore the script up. I said, mm-mm, I’m not gonna do this anymore. And now I didn’t have an answer, and I teach that now. I didn’t have anything laid out, and I was terrified because I was terrified of the pain and I thought I was gonna die without the medicine.
And they often would repeat that. What are you gonna do? You could die of a stroke. So I thought that was saving me. So when I wrote the book ‘The Truth Within the Lie,’ the truth is the medicine was killing me. And just in the nick of time did I really save myself because what I didn’t know yet was that I had staph, you know, I had contracted staph my legs, my immune system was crashing, I was underweight, my legs they were injecting my legs, could no longer take the abuse, the constant attack on them. And I had 17 forms of staph in my legs.
And I told God, I said, if I survive this, I will serve and pay this forward the rest of my life. And I have held true to that. I’m as transparent. Anything anyone, I will be as transparent. If I can help someone evolve through my story and get through the shame. And oh my God, the shame that I was hiding behind. No one knew. And I’m married to a practitioner. And I remember going into the immediate care and saying, I need something, I need my legs swapped. I can smell something and it smells like a dead animal, I need help. And he did that. And I went on a little vacation and he called me and said, You need to get back here now. And that was the beginning of trying to save my legs, which they said we could lose them.
I was sitting there thinking, what’s happening? You know, what is happening here? And again, that was the beginning of the awakening, just the awakening. And then I started remembering holistic clinics that I had gone to and some rare moments that had come up. You know, I was at a yoga match at this alternative clinic up in Victoria, Canada, and it was sensational. Now I look back on it and it was so ahead of its time. And there was one moment on this acupuncture where there was an enormous amount of release and trauma in the body. I don’t have any trauma because in my blinders and in my stories, and that’s what we do. We live in this story world. I didn’t know that anyone else’s life was different from mine.
You know, I had an alcoholic father, a mother that was doing the very best she could, but incredibly failed to attach. So I was really on my own surviving and creating more trauma bonds in the world. And I didn’t even know I was attracting that. And the losses I did, I didn’t even know that through my abandonment, I was attracting a ton of abandonment. So, I think in that awakening at the holistic clinics, I started putting the pieces together, like, well, that’s interesting that I said that. And there were some things I said out loud because I was a business lobbyist prior to that.
I was really on my own surviving and creating more trauma bonds in the world. And I didn't even know I was attracting that. And the losses I did, I didn't even know that through my abandonment, I was attracting a ton of abandonment.”
And I remember flying off the mat and saying, I don’t think I’m a Republican. And it, I come from a very conservative background. It wasn’t whether I was a Republican or not a Republican. I realized that I was a really good soldier. I never made my own decision. And that I wasn’t leading from a place of authority, but of fear, a fear of doing the wrong thing, the fear of not showing up.
And what would people, you know, what would people say if I didn’t show up and achieve and look and do all the things I was doing? So the ego masks were thick and hard. And when I say ego masks, it’s how I show up in the world with what I show people and the imposter syndrome. And again, the pain and suffering and shame behind that of never really showing up and asking and living a life of true authenticity of what I really desired. I didn’t even know what that looked like.
Oh my gosh, there’s so much to unpack here. I want to ask you. You’ve spoken about defeating your own lies, right? What was the hardest truth you had to face in order to start that healing process?
Because you just talked about this kind of barrage of things that you had to deal with, the layers from family, from parents, from society, from your own understanding of what you should be living. So, how did you do that?
That’s a loaded questions because shame can be very, very powerful. And we hide behind it because if we show anyone our truth, we get judged. So I think for me, my biggest moment was I couldn’t get those years back from being sick. I lost over a decade, a decade of medicine, a decade of illness. It wasn’t just the medicine. I was sick. I have three daughters that are now grown, in their 30s. And I couldn’t fix what had been done to them. The shame around that, I have to still breathe through. I have to hold space for their truth and stop defending mine.
Yeah, I had to defend. So I had to step out of defense. So no more offense defense. And I had to hold and be accountable, radically accountable for their truth, not just mine, because everyone has their own version of truth. My truth, it looks different than their truth, but it doesn’t make their truth less truthful. So I think that when I went to the root problem, I think that we call in circumstances and we’re going to keep calling them in our life.
For me, an enormous amount of abandonment, betrayal. So I attracted a lot of betrayal. And 25 years into my marriage, this was my rock, another huge betrayal. Finding out that there was infidelity through my whole marriage. He eventually lost his medical license because it was with patients. It was huge. So I absolutely exploded. I had enough work under me, 10 years of doing the work and healing. To at least give me some kind of foundation, but I shattered on every level.
But that we call this in because that betrayal led me to the core wound betrayal. Had I not had that happen, I couldn’t go back. And I always identified with one of the parents as probably where I was probably abandoned the most, actually came to find out that was a safer parent. You know, my dad, the alcohol, was a safer parent than the one that I was absolutely clinging to for approval. And I was going through this cycle of abuse, really emotional abuse.
And when I identified that, I just remembered one Saturday at two o’clock, maybe I’m being misunderstood again. And I’m just trying to fix it, fix it, fix it. I just stopped and said, no more. There, there’s my core wound. And I think we have to identify, we have to go all the way back to the versions of us. And then step two I every time shame wants to creep up or I want to hide a little bit or not, I go back and I find that version of me that’s showing up.
And I think love and compassion, we cannot show up in the world with love and compassion. We can’t pay anything forward until we do the healing. And I pull them forward and I love them forward. And I tell them how brave and strong they were to get through that because they got me here. I can’t shame any version of me that got me here. I survived it. I kept my legs— yes, they’re scarred.
They’re not beautiful legs anymore, but they’re beautiful to me. You know, people will yeah, I remember when I first started showing them at and that and it was getting pedicures. That was my first thing. And I remember someone saying, ‘what, did a shotgun hit you?’, thinking it was funny. I was dying inside. I mean, I could feel the emotion of run, Dana, run, get out of here, never show them again. And I thought, nope, that that won’t do either. There are layers of healing. There are layers of— in everything that happened—awakened me to another level of acceptance. Does that make sense?
It so makes sense. And you know the part of what you just said there that I’d love for you to maybe expand on because women that are watching, listening and reading this, I feel they need to know this. And that is, why was it that the parent that you thought wasn’t the parent that could support you was the one that ended up supporting you rather than the one that you were clinging to? Can we just unpack that for a moment, because that really—that stung.
Yeah, I think that what I was told as, when I was smaller, that this was a safer parent because she looked more stable. She was the one that was providing what it looked like more stability. My dad was an alcoholic, so when I and my parents divorced when I was six, seven. And so I spent my summers with my dad. Oftentimes that emotional of having his children come, and he had stepchildren too, that event would be overwhelming emotionally for him. So he would binge drink.
So I would get to witness that behavior, so it didn’t feel safe for me. So what felt safe for me was the parent that was there and not drinking. So I equated not drinking with safety. And it wasn’t, you know, and there were signs along the way. And my other siblings probably woke up a little bit quicker than I did. My trauma bond with my mom was very, very deep. I was the chosen one that she blamed for everything. So I was constantly trying to defend myself and show up in the world. And this will lead to people pleasing, constantly overexplaining.
And I started to recognize where I was doing it the most and where the rug was being pulled out from, no matter what I did, I was back to square one, root one with her every time—I’m like, I just gave this so much energy—no matter what I do, this is what she’s going to do to gain control over me again. That’s where she powered up. And as long as she had me, the black sheep out of those five children.
And you know, this is the first time I’ve actually been so bold to talk about it because I’ve had a lot of my father passed away. He drowned when I was 30—and that was difficult. But you know, I believe in earth angels being born and intuitive. My dad is really present all the time. But my mom is still alive and she listens and follows. And I don’t want to hurt her. But at the risk of that, I have to be honest about it. And I love her and I have enormous compassion for the fact that she failed to connect with her mom. I am healing generational trauma.
Yes.
And I have to speak out because I am not the only one that has experienced this and that is living through it right now. And we’re going to keep paying it forward and attracting people in our lives that are our core relationships.
Oh my gosh, you’re just so right on everything that you just said there. It’s not just what we go through as individuals, it’s everything that is lobbied at us from the generations. And even when you look at your mom, who knows what she went through, right?
Who knows what her narrative is that she felt she needed to be the way that she was, that she needed an outlet to kind of like—you know, to latch out to—and it happened to be you, right? So and then we start to then have a narrative of ourselves that well, perhaps I am the version of who she thinks I am.
My trauma bond with my mom was very, very deep. I was the chosen one that she blamed for everything. So, I was constantly trying to defend myself and show up in the world. And this will lead to people pleasing, constantly over explaining.”
Yeah, or I’m not good enough, and I’ve got to try extra hard. And we don’t have a clear lens of our truth. We have—I’m looking at my life through her lens and constantly competing to be enough. Yeah, you know, our birthright, we’re born enough. We’re born worthy. We’re born, you know, in abundance, we’re born with two fears. The fear of lying—or not lying—I’m thinking of the book. The fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. That is it. That is it. Everything that we’ve accumulated along the way. We’ve grabbed a hold.
And Brennan Brown just said something very powerful. She’s resurrected and she’s back on podcast shows. And I caught this mini clip of her saying: “It isn’t the fear that stops us from moving forward. It’s the armour that we keep picking back up.” And what kind of truth is that? 95% of our subconscious is running the show. We’re interjecting five per cent every day of our truth. And we’re running off programs that we’ve installed and that we have believed to be our truth. It is our job to identify and step into the newness, which is that terror barrier, you know, because our ego is protecting that maze. I call it the maze because it’s like back over there. I got you. We’re protected here. We know this one. Let’s get a different outcome.
But the newness is where we need to go in order to evolve. And it can be terrifying. It can be more terrifying than trying to repeat the same cycle and trying to get a different outcome. And that’s exactly what we’re doing.
That’s exactly what we do. Let’s unpack that a little bit, Dana. You’ve said that women are often taught lies about their worth and their power. What are some of those lies and how do we quietly limit ourselves? Which is why we don’t actually go to the other side of that fence. We stay on the side that keeps torturing us because at least we know that we can handle that torture, or we think we can.
That question because I think that that’s a dual the the duality of it is is we take on the invisible workload as women and I think generationally we’re taught that we’re we’re born more compassionate I think that we hold the space for growth and children, you know we are designed differently, you know, it would be impossible for me to say that we’re designed the same as a man we’re not. And I celebrate those differences but in that we also adapt the generational patterns of how our grandmother did it, and it’s so subconscious and so subtle.
I mean how many of us cook and do all the things that our grandmother did. And what’s coming up, Thanksgiving’s coming up and then we’re using we’re pulling out the recipes that generations have used I’m gonna make my grandmother’s lemon sour cake pie and her German chocolate cake and that was probably her mother’s, you know but there’s this there’s this I don’t know if this is applicable or not but I it just dropped in and I’m gonna share this story.
There is a story I sometimes share and it’s kind of paraphrased but it it’s like the granddaughter asked the the mother you know she asked them, the mom, “Hey mom, why do we cut off—it’s a meatloaf recipe—why do we cut half of the meatloaf off and you know can you ask grandma why we do that because it’s grandma’s recipe,” and the grandmother—she—mom goes to the grandmother and the grandmother says: “Well it’s because I didn’t have a big enough pan.” So see—we’re still doing—we’re still limiting ourselves because our grandmother limited herself.
When I was 10 years old, now that I’m 61, women could have credit cards for the first time, could be on mortgages. It’s crazy that I was born into, you know, in 1964, these women didn’t have these rights. I don’t think we, if we just put a different lens on it and look at where we have come from, and right now it we’re kind of imploding on the entrepreneurship scene.
I mean, I don’t know if you can feel that vibration out there, but women are getting empowered. They’re not asking for permission anymore. They’re showing up and they’re busting through those glass ceilings. And I mean, I’m watching it. I work with women all over the world. And I’m telling you, I see where they’re limited. I see the stories they’re telling themselves. And it’s my job to keep removing those layers, so they are so empowered that I just watch them fly. And it’s a beautiful thing.
Absolutely, and so let’s talk a little bit about what you just said there. Many women carry guilt for wanting more, right? And that seems to be a big thing that, you know, stands in our way towards our greatness.
How can they start unlearning those old narratives within, you know, without feeling the shame for having, you know, this idea that they deserve more and that they deserve to be in first place? Like you’ve been through that. Can you share how you did it?
How can these women do it? Because that’s the thing that I find with women that I work with as well, Dana. You know, like the just bridging the gap between the competence and the confidence is such a huge gap because women are so fiercely competent and like you said, are now starting to realize that you know the empowerment comes from you know themselves, the work that they need to do, which then they realize that they can do all the things that they’ve been told that they can’t do or to say small and all of the the narratives that you and I we know, right?
So can you share that? Like how do we break past the old narratives, which are very heavy generational you know, limitations to put ourselves first—how do we do that as women?
Oh, there’s so many great answers to this, but I would start with whom you’re surrounding yourself with. I look at layers of life. I look at friendships, I look at who’s the most dominant voice in your head? Is it a parent? Is it a family member? What stories are you telling yourself? Because the stories are going to whatever your mind, your most dominant thought, that’s the life you’re gonna create. If I don’t think I can do it, I’m not gonna do it.
If I have money stories and I don’t believe I can create a million-dollar business, guess what? I’m not going to create it. And then I’m going to say, I don’t know what’s happening. I’m doing everything, but I just can’t create it. They don’t even realize the root is what, and this is where the lie really comes in. We lie to ourselves in our subconscious because we’ve got this programming and we haven’t identified yet that it’s not even our story.
And you know, I tell a story, I just got back from doing a keynote in Boston and I told a story about my grandmother was a large one of the largest real estate brokers in California and and self-made millionaire, you know. And I really respected her. But she said, never buy a new car, always buy real estate. So I always did that. But when I started making a lot of money, I wanted a new Range Rover and I could afford it.
But that voice was still in my head. I didn’t even realize it wasn’t my story. I was just being guided by her story. And then I thought back, it was my dad’s birthday, December 31st. I got in the car, drove to the Range Rover dealership two hours away, picked out my defender, said ” row free” on it, and it sits in my driveway today. I don’t get to drive it, but to the airport and back most of the time. But I love that car. And that car broke a money story.
So I think we have to identify first the stories we’ve created. That was a story that was part of my lack and scarcity story. My grandmother came out of the depression. Of course she had lack and scarcity. She, you know, and I got it was an honour to take care of her in the last eight years of her life. But I will tell you. I remember being at the attorneys and her asking if she could bury those millions with her. She did not want to give that up. She did not let money flow.
There’s so many layers to this abundance that we want and this expansion. And we also have to identify if the ego is in control or is it the heart energy in control? Because the heart is going to expand and it’s going to be vast and wide and it’s going to be filled with freedom and flow. The ego is going to contract, it’s going to divide, separate, judge.
So identify. Are you judging? Are you comparing? Are you surrounding yourself with gossip? Are the women lifting you up? Are they challenging you? Are you feeling inspired every day? Because you can, by the women that you surround yourself, the team, the men and women that you surround yourself with.
Absolutely.
There's so many layers to this abundance that we want and this expansion. And we also have to identify if the ego is in control or is it the heart energy in control? Because the heart is going to expand and it's going to be vast and wide and it's going to be filled with freedom and flow. The ego is going to contract, it's going to divide, separate, judge.
Particularly women tend to be anchored into and don’t want to give up their old narrative because what if it doesn’t work? What if I lose everything?
What if it is a big one though, Dana for us, right?
It’s that pause. It’s where people don’t hire a mentor. What if I waste that money? But what if this is your breakthrough? What on the other side of that sky’s the limit? What if? But they’re terrified to let go because this story has kept them safe. And they would have to address what it is in their life that isn’t working. That means a potential divorce. That means change. And there’s nothing more frightening, for women, especially with a safety issue, than change. Any form of change or newness is like, oh, well, that looks great for you, but oh yeah, another day. And then they sit, yeah, they worry and they churn. Worry, doubt, fear. If any of that is going on, that will keep you in the struggle.
Absolutely, and that’s when you do need the mentor or the guide or the book. So let’s go to your book ‘The Truth Within the Lie: How To Align With Universal Principles To Create The Life You Deserve.’ Dana, can you share what people would expect to get out of this book? Because I feel like it’s a great starting point for those women out there who have all of these things that you just talked about and don’t know kind of, you know, where do I go? How do I do this?
I always find reaching outside of yourself is always the best first step. So I feel that your book is going to be a great way where women can do that. Share what this book is about, who is it for, and what’s the big takeaway?
Okay, a multi-faceted layered question, but we’re going to start. So it dropped two universal laws. There’s 14 universal laws I chose. And I tell 14 stories in my life and what the truth was, what the lie was, and what universal law is applicable and all the modalities. I don’t just go with universal laws, but all the things they can do to evolve forward. And I think that if they’re listening to this and they’re leaning in, don’t disengage. Don’t—stay connected, stay connected, even uncomfortable, and see how that mirrors back at your life, how you can identify.
Your story might be different from mine, but the truth might be the same as what you’re living. So in this book, I’m gonna go with two universal laws. The first one is cause and effect. And this is where women get really uncomfortable. You are first cause. You come first. That means boundaries, parameters. That means you, if you don’t, you can’t.
We know that saying, you can’t pour from an empty cup. If you don’t fulfill yours, you can’t pay anything forward. You show up resentful back in the ego energy. We have to start identifying how we’re showing up every day. And not playing the blame game, but being accountable, like where is this coming from? It’s kind of like those old little view masters that we put on.
You know, we’ve created this scenario, snap, and it’s not real. It’s not the life we really want, but we don’t even know how to find that because we’ve layered up what we’ve imposed on this. Invisible workload on us that we have to. How many women have you said, oh, I can’t hire anyone? Oh no, that’s my job. Ask for help.
You know, it was when I started waking up, that invisible workload was just illuminating. That’s where I got my value. Where do you get your value? If you don’t do all that, if you don’t cook dinner every night, if you don’t, if you don’t decorate the house for two weeks for the holidays and entertain and you’re the one, if you don’t ask for—what does that mean? What story do you make that mean for you?
So you’ve got to come first and that means start assessing where you are in your life. Start breaking it down where you can ask for help or have you isolated yourself into the lone ranger and to, you know, you’re your Captain Marvel, you’re the one that’s you know a superwoman and you’re gonna show up because I was superwoman. I could do it all.
If I wasn’t doing it all, I would be sick and debilitated taking medicine. So there was no middle ground and there’s a middle ground we have to meet ourselves in the middle. And as a ‘Libra’ balances everything. And you know and with cause and effects, you know, women get really uncomfortable with coming first. They’re like, oh no, no, my kids come first, and then my husband—oh no, they’re way down on the totem pole. You come first— first cause and everything is an effect from that.
And the second one is the universal law of surrender. What are you willing to give up to live the life that you want if you just want one thing and I believe in the one degree if I’m off by one degree in my life And I’m on a plane and I’m flying, that’s 360 miles, I’m off—of course. I’m not gonna land in the middle of the ocean, not in Hawaii.
So, what is one degree that you can do every day to get in alignment with what you truly desire? You gotta ask for it. And you’ve got to surrender. You’ve got to give it up what no longer fits the life. If you say you want a life of abundance and you say you want vacations and more peace and joy and you aren’t getting it, what in your life is preventing you from that?
Because you’re the first cause. You’re in complete control. Our greatest power is the right to choose every day, this in the present moment. The past doesn’t need you. The future doesn’t need you. Right here and now is where all our power is. This is where we can make the changes and the difference in our life. But if we’re in the stories, then we go to the what ifs in the future, and we’ve completely spiritually bypassed our PowerPoint.
You know, because we’re not, we don’t know how to drop in and navigate there. I say deal with that. Breathe. A lot of women don’t breathe. They’re sitting up here and it’s very shallow and they’re over processing, overthinking, over-delivering, anxious. Breathe through it and be willing to sit with what may be coming up from you for you.
You know, Dana, you talk a lot about divine timing. Like I feel that you just kind of talked about that, but I want to kind of talk a little bit more directly about that. Can you share a moment in your journey? Because I think that might be helpful for people to try and translate it over into kind of the journey that they’re going through that maybe they don’t recognize.
So I’m gonna ask you directly. Can you share a moment in your journey when things didn’t go to plan, but alignment revealed a better path? Because I feel that’s the piece that just may be the piece that someone needs to hear.
Yeah. Well, that would be trusting the process. And that was the original name of my book. And the sign behind me, if I could illuminate that a little bit, says trust the process. So trusting the process means trusting your process. Everything in the universe is working for you, not against you. And that isn’t when things are going right. Because I can guarantee you, even in the abundance of the life I have reinvented and recreated, it doesn’t always go right for me.
But I am grateful for it all because everything is a learned moment. Everything, if everything is working for me, I’m not going to pick and choose. On a bad day, I’m not going to say, oh my gosh, the bottom’s falling out. What’s happening? No, I’m like, oh, isn’t that interesting? What do I need to know? I upgrade my language.
And so I call that in and say, what do I need to know from that? So, you know, I got a huge tax bill a couple of years ago. And instead of the old me would have freaked out, it’s over, my God, I’m going under. Down the rabbit hole, big big black hole. And instead I said, Oh my gosh, that’s so interesting. You know, and I said, I made a shit ton of money. And I wasn’t prepared for that. We need more write-offs. We need a bigger boat.
So it was information. It was information I needed to hire a better accountant and to structure things differently. So the bottom is never falling out. That information is coming to you and it will come fast and hard, especially when you are contemplating change. You’ll say, Oh my gosh, it’s just not possible. If you can be still through that, and this is an ebb and flow situation, we’re in flow and nurture when we’re in our heart energy. When the ego’s there, we’re we’re gonna be our, we’re not gonna be an advocate for change. We’re gonna divide and judge and separate ourselves from abundance because that lives over here in our life force energy and the masculine side of our body, which means we have to receive new information.
Everything in the universe is working for you, not against you. And that isn't when things are going right. Because I can guarantee you, even in the abundance of the life I have reinvented and recreated, it doesn't always go right for me.
And I believe in it, I did not know what to do when I tore those scripts up in my kitchen. But all of a sudden, I wasn’t online. I was really in isolation. And because I didn’t want anyone to see what was going on. So all of a sudden, there was Louise Hayes’ book and on ‘Heal Your Life In 21 Days.’ And I read it. I didn’t even know at that time. Louise Hay and I share the same birthday, same birth hours, all of it. I didn’t know any of that. And later that we wear the same ring on the same finger, and later to find out we’re really connected.
And you know, so look for signs. Signs, you will attract what you need to evolve. And if anyone’s saying I’m not attracting anything but trauma bonds, those trauma bonds are showing up to show you where you have connected, vibrationally, because everything is energy. Everything is energy and we know that money is just energy.
And if you’ve got layers of stories, generational stories like I did. I mean, money doesn’t grow on trees. All those little one-liners had me terrified. And my story was, oh no, I’m not good with money because I was told, ‘Oh, you’re not good with money You’re an over spender,’ because I bought a pair of jeans once and you know, and I put too much gas in my car, zipping around in high school. So that seed, spiritual seed was planted. You’re not good with money. Someone said I was overweight in high school and I was thinner than I am now. It’s crazy. But that created an eating disorder for years.
It’s unbelievable how much external stuff we allow ourselves to absorb. Yes. So I want to ask you this question. Because, you know, allowing ourselves to be successful women also comes with a lot of what you just talked about. So for the ambitious women watching, listening, and reading this, Donna, how can they balance that inner drive with the need to surrender and trust the process, which is something that, you know, you vehemently believe in, because sometimes that’s what the hardest part is.
Yeah. Well, that’s a great question because the old me would push. I mean, I would bear and I took pride in knocking down doors. I took pride in not listening. I took pride in setting records as a lobbyist, sales records, and that was trauma bonding. There was no way I could show up and do that again.
I think that when we adapt the nurture and flow, which means I’m attracting everything. In fact, any time that I enter the struggle that I need to do more, push harder, fill my year up with more this year in, I get very still this time of year and say, what do I need to know? I just cancelled the trip to New York. I’m slowing down and I’m paying attention. I’m assessing the year, what went right? What were my biggest moments that I learned from? What did I attract all year long? What do I want for 2026? And what spiritual seeds am I willing to plant?
Because control is just an illusion. We have no control, but structure is important. But I think they need to adapt. If I said everything is energy and everything vibrates, where are you vibrating? Joy, happiness, laughter, vibrate very high. And if we have more joy, I just posted a picture. I took a break before this podcast. I walked out to get my tea and I walked past the sun just barrelling in my living room. And I took a picture of it and I shared it and I said, joy-filled moment. I sat, I said, you have three minutes. I sat and I did some deep breathing, and I could hear my water boiling and I’m like, oh my gosh, it was such a beautiful moment. Those joyful moments are what are filling up our days.
Stop waiting for these big moments. You know, at 61, I can say there were huge moments that I can barely remember. I’m like, oh yeah, yeah, that yeah. It’s the little moments. It’s what my day is filled with that raises my vibration, that attracts the women that I connect with.
Because we’re not going to get, we’re not going to connect or attract anything. And it’s all attraction. You could push very hard and you’re out of alignment 1000%. It’s that one degree of trust. Do you trust who you are? And if you don’t, you’ve got to get in alignment with that. Because you know, I call it the trust fall. Where are you out of trust with yourself? Where do you, where do you not trust yourself?
You know, I feel like what you’re saying there is kind of like that seesaw of you know shrinking and expanding, shrinking and expanding that we put ourselves through. You’ve mentioned moments when you stopped shrinking and started expanding. Like you’ve been kind of, you know, voicing that as we’ve been chatting.
What can I ask you, Dana, like what was one of those moments that changed within you the narrative of that seesaw of shrinking and expanding that we go through as humans? Can you pinpoint something that makes the work worse?
Yeah, taking back my power and detaching from external validation, what people think of me is none of my business. It’s none of my business. So when somebody wants to share a gossip moment of something that’s painful or, you know, I remember once a girlfriend said we were in her living room and there was some kind of game that she invited me to. And she goes, you know, you’re a lot of energy. She says, so just if you and I’m like . . .
I better believe. Yeah, I’m a lot of people. I love your energy.
Thank you. So I would play it small. I would try to adapt so the world would, I would be more digestible. I would make better friends. That is an inauthentic connection and we’ll never take my power back like this. I come from a place of love and compassion first with me. I had to do the work. Yeah. And now I can pay that forward so genuinely. And when I see women that show up like that, I have love and compassion, not judgment.
The ego wants to judge and say, ‘Oh my God, what she’s doing over there.’ No, it’s like, oh wow, you’re hurting and you’re in a lot of grief. And I go right to where that is. And oftentimes, and I think that’s why I attract the level of women that I do. They want more. They want more joy.
Money’s just going to follow your authority. If you and if you are not the authority in your life and someone else’s voice is dominant or presence is dominant and you don’t even know what that looks or feels like, nothing’s going to follow you. Except for what you’ve created. And it’s like a whirlpool. It’s like groundhogs day. It’s gonna repeat until you say ‘I’m gonna break the cycle.’ And I really believe in speaking our life out loud. You know, every morning I wake up and I do these practices.
Before my eyes are even open, I’m up at 3 a.m. I meditate with all my clients each day. I’m an intuitive coach too. So I write down notes that come through and I let that guide me. And it’s brilliant, it’s a brilliant way to do it because I’m in deep trust with my God and source. But with that, I do these practices, all is well in my world. We have to reprogram and we have to pick up tools that are easy and makes sense. If it’s too difficult and we’re trying to do this complicated process, it’s not gonna work. It doesn’t have to be hard. We know the hard way. The ego makes it hard, and we don’t know our way out of the maze.
Absolutely.
We have to be radically accountable for what we're saying every day. I say set your alarm on your watch or phone. We are all carrying phones every two hours and then drop in. And that moment that alarm goes off, what's my most dominant thought? What's my most dominant thought? Because your life is following your most dominant thought.
It makes it easy. It’s expansive, it’s easy, it should be easy. And you know, we’ve got to choose easy. So I do this breath work before my eyes even open. All is well in my world. I am safe. I am loved, I am protected. If I have a moment where I can, it doesn’t mean those feelings go away. You know, I just got back from walking the Camino from Portugal to Spain, and then my daughter flew over who’s pregnant at 30, my first grandbaby’s coming, the first part of the year, and she came over five months pregnant. It was such an incredible time floating around the Mediterranean.
We did everything we wanted, but I took a lot of time off work and then I started to say, What are you doing? Still in Spain, you need to get home. You need to reconnect. And I said, Oh no, oh no. This is sacred time. This is my moment. These are the moments that warn it. But if I had imposed that, I would have started to disconnect from that present moment. And I wouldn’t have been fully present for all those magical moments. And did all of it go great? No, all my luggage was ransacked on a little airline called Ryanair. And I’m gonna give everyone a shout out. Don’t fly Ryanair. You know, I would have known and gone to their site and read the amount of theft that had happened, but they stole all my jewellery.
It, you know, and if I believe that everything is working for us, not against us, it doesn’t mean I like that they stole my beautiful pieces because I was there for six weeks and I brought a lot with me. I always do. It’s the first time that that’s ever happened. But I did say, I did speak into the universe before I left that they need to downsize. I need to give a lot of things.
And I had bought racks and did a video just before I got rid of over 40%. The room behind me is a complete wardrobe room. I love beautiful things. I’m a Libra, I love to surround myself with art and I’ve downsized. So I’ve got to release some stuff. Universal law of surrender. I said, before I go on this journey, I’m gonna surrender and I’m gonna give beautiful things that have barely been born, but I need to sort and enlighten the load.
So I put that out there and they lighten my load. Now I don’t. So I say be specific, get specific because I wasn’t specific. I also said I need to get rid of a lot of my jewelry. I didn’t mean that jewelry. So we speak it out there that I spoke it out there and the universe is leaning in saying, let me support you. It doesn’t mean I wanted my beautiful things stolen, but I can’t pick and choose what works for me and what doesn’t work for me.
It’s all working for me. And which means I have struggled with the release of that. And there is grief around it. There are beautiful pieces that I bought along the way. When I made a million, in the first year of my business, five years into my business, I would have a piece of jewellery made. And two of those pieces were stolen. And I’m just having some remade that I loved and the price is quadrupled because gold has gone up. And I’m like, what this isn’t working for me.
It doesn’t mean that it’s all gonna just drop on our head and illuminate, and I’m quantum leaping every moment. It means that I have to slow down around those moments and say, what did I say out there in existence? And then I remembered what I said and what I had done before I went. And I wasn’t being specific. I was being very general.
And so we need to speak about our life. It’s our life. We have to be radically accountable for what we’re saying every day. I say set your alarm on your watch or phone. We are all carrying phones every two hours and then drop in. And that moment that alarm goes off, what’s my most dominant thought? What’s my most dominant thought? Because your life is following your most dominant thought. Usually when we wake up in the morning, there’s your most dominant thought.
Absolutely. Oh my gosh, you know, I have to ask you this from what you just said there. How do you discern between growth that’s ego driven versus expansion that’s soul led, cause you’ve been talking about it, but I feel like people need a direct answer?
Ego-driven would be I’m judging myself for the amount of work I’m doing every day. I’m working harder. I’ve got to, I’ve got there’s some story I’m attached to that if I don’t work hard, I’m not gonna be successful.
So it’s kind of I’m using language like slay all day, all and I’m showing up and I’m a workaholic and I’m showing everybody the high reels, not the low reels. I I’m afraid, I’m afraid of all that because the ego is about fear, division, judge, and we’re doing it to ourselves. And we’re spinning our wheels.
We might be making some headway, but there is an easier way. That is such a difficult way. And I know that way, I know that way for years. It never brought the abundance I wanted. But we will never rise above the level of our worthiness. There’s your high low. If you don’t believe you can make that, guess where you’re gonna stay? Slaying all day, working hard, the busy work. I say anything less than $45 an hour, you hire out for.
I don’t do any busy work. I delegate. I’ve got a beautiful team. I’ve got team leads everywhere. I stay connected to source and attraction. That’s my job. You’ve got to know your job. It doesn’t mean that we don’t wear all the hats, but we know where our strength and our power is. And coaches will do this a lot. I have to do it all. I can’t afford. You can get a VA right now. Yeah. For $200 a month to delegate and help you build. They could meet you wherever you are.
Stop the stories that you can’t. You have to listen to what you’re saying. I don’t believe I can’t do anything. It’s a choice. It’s a choice. You’re choosing that your story says you can’t hire that. And I can guarantee you spend that at Target or Walmart or the grocery store on random snacks at the end of the day when you’re hungry. I can guarantee you there’s energy leaks everywhere. And I say, plu every time you say I can’t afford that or there’s no money for that, say there’s no energy for that. Replace the word money with energy and see how that works for you. Your life will illuminate like, well, I do have the energy for that.
So I think that living a soul-fed, soul led life is expansive. It means that I’m trusting at a deep level, regardless of, and this is gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. Whether my bank account has $10 or 10 million, I am grateful for that money. I am grateful my for my bills being paid. I resent nothing. Everything is attached to a high vibrational energy. And I I never ever drop into worry, doubt, and fear.
It rubbed up against me when I was in Europe. I’m like, what are you doing? You’re haemorrhaging money. And I said, Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No, you are absolutely a massive attractor of money. So it’s my language that I speak out. And I am. I’ve always been a massive attractor of money. Now, whether I kept it or not was another thing because that was a worthiness level. So, you know, I had to get, I had to get a line with my worth, which means what stories am I telling myself? Do I even believe? What is a heart expansion, soul led life? Well, it means trust. Do you trust yourself? Can you trust the moments that aren’t going right? That they’re what do I need to know? Ask asking upgraded questions.
I say put a stake in it and start there. You got to put a stake in it and say, I desire this. Boom, you've activated the first law. The universe is saying - what did you just say you wanted? And then all of a sudden you have signs coming in, intuitive signs that you have called in because you put a demand on the universe. The universe is not gonna do anything unless you put a demand on it.
Like I said, I do that practice in the morning. All is well in my world. I call in the peace. I don’t start my day with chaos. Chaos may incur, but I don’t have to participate in any of that. I can, I’m a great observer. That’s and I my favourite line is, oh, that’s so interesting that that’s showing up. Oh, look at that. I could activate. I know what the old me would have done. I’d have lost my shit on that one. But now I’m just now I’m watching it saying, Yeah, I could even rile a response because I’m deeply in my body. I’m connected to source. And I’m like, oh, that’s so interesting that that’s showing up. What do I need to know?
And every day in the mirror, as I go in to brush my teeth in the morning, one of my first questions is mirror work. What do you need for me today, Dana? And I honour that. The honour. Oh, I’m the first cause. I’m gonna honour where I am. I had dental surgery two days ago and had an implant put in. And I needed it the next day off, which was yesterday. My jaw was stiff. And I said, okay, we’re gonna rearrange and I’m gonna work. I don’t normally work on Friday, I’m gonna work on Friday. I’m gonna see clients on Friday.
And see, I gave myself permission to make the changes honouring me, not oh, what is everyone gonna think? Oh, everyone’s gonna be upset because they have their set day. No, there’s no set anything. Everything is in flow. If I’m in nurture and flow, I’m attracting the people that I’m aligned with. Doesn’t mean that it all goes right. It just means that I trust that even when it doesn’t, I have a better response for it. Because everything, our power is in our response. We’re how we intake and our outtake. There’s all your power every single day.
Absolutely, and you know, I want to now lead right into something that you teach called intuitive leadership, because I feel that that’s kind of a little bit about what you’re talking about here. Can you share with everyone what intuitive leadership means and how it differs from the traditional leadership mod models that we’ve been taught. I feel like I know, but I’d like you to share.
You know, another multi-layered, but if I kept it simple, it’s really about for me keeping it simple, connecting, being an active listener. And if I’m not listening and I’m not soul led and I’m not connecting, and I’m and I’m trauma driven and I’m money driven and I’m working hard, I am missing all the signs. And the universe is full of signs.
I can hear, it’s like the white car syndrome. You know, the minute I say, I’m gonna buy a white car, maybe I’m gonna buy a white camera. I see a million white cameras that were not on my radar before. So we call in what we need to evolve. And I think if we’re intuitive, we are all deeply intuitive. A lot of women will say, I trust my gut. Well, don’t trust your gut. That’s attached to your spleen. And that’s where all your fear is processed. Trust your intuition. It lives differently, it sets differently in the body and learns to trust that.
And I don’t, you know, I remember my life when I was in and out of trust with myself, second guessing myself, being a born intuitive, a born seer. I would see things and say, Oh, I can’t know that, because I couldn’t be a woman of faith and believe that too. I was in and out of my belief system. Where are we in and out of our belief system in your life? It might be religion, it might be foundational, it might be someone else’s opinion of what you should be doing. Where are you in and out of what you want, what you desire?
I say put a stake in it and start there. You got to put a stake in it and say, I desire this. Boom, you’ve activated the first law. The universe is saying, What did you just say you wanted? And then all of a sudden you have signs coming in, intuitive signs that you have called in because you put a demand on the universe. The universe is not gonna do anything unless you put a demand on it. It’s kind of like angels and you ‘re not even gonna act to be activated unless you ask. That’s just a universal law.
So I think about all of these things. We have so much, so many resources working for us that we don’t activate. And we think that as women, we’re gonna how many women put on that cape each day, I gotta do it. Get out of my way. I do it best, I do it faster, I do it better. And it’s in every area of our business, you know, and this is the perfection paralysis. Are you okay just getting it done? There are times, even on my podcast show, which just ranked in the top two percent in less than a year, and I’m like, it’s so full of imperfections.
You know, I am dyslexic, I reverse sentences sometimes. And I’m like, oh, that didn’t make sense. We don’t cut that out. I slaughter names sometimes. And I remember Dave Melsner said, and I said Metzler through the whole thing, and he let me do it for an hour and a half. He says, I’m giving you 20 minutes. He allowed that to go for an hour and a half and it is a great podcast. And then in the end, he says, if I didn’t love Dana, I would not have allowed her to mispronunciation my name. It’s David Metzler and not Mesler, not Metzler, like she did.
And I’m like, it was one of those moments, kind of like a book that I quoted through the whole thing and I said, wonder lust instead of Wonder Hell, which is a best line book. And she didn’t tell me till the end. Hey, don’t be afraid to make mistakes because that is your growth edge. Without all of that, I miss all the learned moments. And I’m here to grow and learn. I have never arrived. I am still learning, I’m still a student, and I always will be.
Yes, I’ve mastered all those things behind my name and years and years of success. I am still really one, I do not want to be the smartest one in the room. I want to learn, I want to be inspired, I want to get into rooms that light me up. Yes. That is joy-filled. And I think that’s listening to the heart to the heart’s energy. That’s attached to heart energy. If I’m in a room and I’m the smartest and I’m the best and I need to prove a lot, that’s ego energy. And you’re in the wrong room.
So in your world, Dana, advocacy seems to be less about speaking for people and more about helping them speak for themselves. So yeah. Let’s address that for a moment. How do you model that in your coaching and in your business?
That’s an interesting question. So I think sometimes we have to lend as coaches when people come to us, we can identify what’s going on intuitively. I know why they’re there. I just know. And that’s why I meditate every morning and I write down what it is I see coming through. And then I look at that and then all it’s like I see where they’re going. I took a break. I never tell them. I used to. I used to do readings. Now it’s like puzzle pieces that I dump out. And I’m there, I’m gonna allow them to ask, I’m gonna ask better questions and I’m gonna allow them to illuminate their life and drop in to what’s working for them, what’s not working for them.
But I think as coaches and leaders, we have to ask better questions, which means our growth is essential, that we are always learning and growing. I am not where I was last year or the year before or five years ago. The transformation is remarkable because I’m still learning. There isn’t anything like this format blueprint. And I have a library of enormous amounts of work that I can give away. But this year I gave away less, less. I trusted more. I was more in flow and I recognize that in my assessment.
You know, I was going to New York in a couple of weeks because the NASDAQ picked up my book and I was gonna go celebrate that. And I called the publisher and publishing house and I said, Is there any way I can do it in the spring? Is there any way I can just be still for the rest of the year where I don’t have to get back on a plane? And I need this time to assess. To just be still.
And how many of us have never given ourselves permission to be still? I certainly didn’t. I was busy all the time, running, running from what I didn’t want to feel, which was uncomfortable, and over-delivering and overgiving. And I think that attachment is what we do. And I think it’s our job as leaders and coaches to illuminate.
And I believe this, we’re never going to attract anyone that isn’t further down the tunnel than us. So we can shine that light and say, this way, this way. And I believe that energy is everything and that it’s always aligned. If we’re aligned, we’re going to attract women that are aligned. And if we don’t, in the beginning, I was not aligned. My sign above my head said, come one, come all. I’m a master certified life coach. And I’m like, what in the heck?
I got tons of people, but it was so out of alignment. I’m like, I’m not a therapist. And I think they would say they were bipolar. There were just all kinds of things. And I’m like, is that what I should be doing? I think that I’m supposed to be referring to counsellors on that. And I mean, literally, I thought none of this feels, and I thought, maybe I’m just uncomfortable. No, I was calling in, come one, come all. Now I’m very specific. I’m very in alignment with whom I need to show up.
How many of us have never given ourselves permission to be still? I didn’t. I was busy running from what I didn’t want to feel.
And all I really require is accountability. I need them to be accountable for showing up, doing the work because man, I’m going to show up when they’re on my radar, I lock and load, which means we’re going to move. That needle is going to move and they are going to do the work. In the beginning, I thought I had to do all the work because there was a worthiness issue. I still had to work through a decade ago. Was I worthy to even lead? Was I worthy? I never said that out loud, but I constantly questioned, are you enough? Are you enough? It’s exhausting to the soul to keep asking, to keep feeling, to keep seeking, you know, and I think we have to identify that.
And now, whenever I think, and this is there’s a new moon going on right now, and it’s dark, and this is a dark time, and we’re losing, we’re putting things down, we’re surrendering, and we’re feeling loss. And we can confuse that with not enough-ness. But how can we be still around that and actually celebrate all these seasons of ourselves? Of menopause, of you, all of it. Because even the silent grief of menopause that we don’t talk about.
As women get older, we don’t talk about it. We talk about women getting older and unseen. I don’t even buy that. I think women in their 50s and 60s and 70s are more beautiful now than ever. 100%. And more powerful. They’re gonna show up in their fullness because they don’t give a shit. Absolutely. They have unpacked all that. And they yeah, they’re tether they’re untethered. So I love that they’re fully embracing their power and you’re just watching, like, what are you gonna do next?
You know, and I feel that for me. I’m asking myself those questions right now. Okay, 2026, something, I’m I’m releasing stuff. What are we gonna build? I don’t have the answer. And it’s none of my business because the universe is twice as powerful as me. So I surrendered and I said, you know what? You can create more abundance than I could ever put a limit on. So I leave that open-ended, but I trust and I’m in the flow and I don’t have to know because the need to know, we have to stay married to this process and divorce the outcome.
If we’re attached to the outcome, I’m back in the grind. I need something from it. And as leaders, we have to release any expectations. Because if I expect anything, I expect a return on this podcast or anything that I do, I show up in service. Where are you showing up? Do you expect someone just said to me, I took someone on a retreat and she goes, I expected this from it.
Absolutely. So, Dana, I want to ask you this for everyone that is watching, listening, and reading this. Who do you work with? Like, who is your ideal client? Who needs to work with you? And how do they work with you?
Because we’ve talked about all the brilliance of everything that you know you’ve shared and imparted on us. And I feel like I’m gonna be watching this episode over and over again because it’s like that perfect movie where just each time you watch it, you glean something new. And I feel that this episode with you is gonna be that for me and for a lot of people.
So I want to be able to hone this in as we get ready to close off and invite in those people that are the right people who are looking for what you can help them with. Who are they? And how do you help them?
Oh, I think that women want more in their life and maybe feel disconnected. There’s so that that answer can be so broad because I work with a lot of women that I refer out to counselling as well. And I work alongside. I work with some of the richest women in the world and I work with women that make payment plans for me. I attract women that just know they aren’t living to their full potential. And they don’t even know what that is. They don’t, they don’t have an answer, they don’t know what’s wrong. They feel something.
So if this conversation has stirred something in you, and you and you can’t resolve it, you can’t figure it out because we go right to up, we go right up and we try to figure it out. We’re or we want to think our way through. Set up a call with me. You know, on my website, people can set up a 30-minute call with me and we can see if you’re a good fit because I dive into their story. I listen to what they say. I take it case by case. This year has been full of one-on-ones. I speak in Masterminds. I’ve got my own Mastermind, the Abundance Architect.
I do keynotes, I do a women’s retreat in Europe each year that fills up really quick because my clients get the first shot, so it’s usually my clients that take it. But I love working, I work with men too, a lot of professionals. It went through dentists, attorneys, and I think that I identify that women, the armour they pick up is their masculine side. They believe they’ve got to deliver and they might be overdelivering.
And then some of them might be hiding. And they may be terrified. They’re wallflowers. They don’t even know how to show up. And these are the ones that really come powering through. The ones that haven’t had a voice yet. They just don’t know what to do next. And I always say you don’t know what to do yet. You know, we love that. We upgrade if you don’t know what to do yet, but you’ve asked the right question and you showed up for you.
I think the first step is to show up, show up for yourself. I can’t make you show up for yourself. And there are women that it breaks my heart that have watched me for years and said, I followed you for three years and I didn’t think I was worthy to work with you or I’d be an ideal client. Do you think that maybe? And I’m like, oh gosh, I wish you would have reached out three years ago. Why did you wait? Stop waiting.
As women, we wait, we wait and we wait. Don’t play the waiting game. Life is too precious. Every moment, this moment between you and I, this connection can’t be replaced. This energetic connection. And it doesn’t wait. If you want more, ask for it. Put a stake in it and get a good mentor. If not me, someone else that lights you up. Because the world is so abundant with eight plus million people in it. There is no competition or scarcity.
I live in an abundant universe, which means I call in and collaborate with women and I attract women that are like-minded and like-hearted. And if they’re not, they soon will be because I lead by example. You know, women that say they support women and I watch something different, it makes me sad. I don’t judge, it makes me sad sometimes because they don’t understand where the real abundance is. And I think that in 2026, it’s going to be about connection. It’s going to be about connection.
It’s going to be about connection not these big productions, but this, these moments that are transformative that women are tapping into and men, because we are evolving. And the ones that choose, you’re going to have the ones that choose not to evolve and the ones that are evolving. And I think the evolution is going to be in connection and evolution in evolving into a more spiritual, heart-centred heart.
And you can see it out there already. More heart-centred work. It’s, you know, and I’ve been doing it a long time, but I’m seeing it catch on. And I’m like, oh, I predicted that for 2026. And I think we’re going to, you’re going to say, I had that conversation with Dana Grant. And she said that. And look what’s happening. Yep. I said it here.
Put the armour down. Be willing to feel the vulnerability—because that connection is where your growth begins.
Oh my gosh. You know, Dana, I’ve been calling you Donna throughout this whole episode because I’m British and it’s yeah, it is Donna for the British, but it’s Dana, so I do correct myself as well.
You know, I get called Donna all the time because I have a lot of UK clients that are British and you know, so you know, you were so close that I didn’t even correct you. Because you know yeah, Dana, Donna, it kinda sounds the same. Okay. Yes.
Well, thank you for your grace. Thank you for your grace with that. So where are we sending everyone? Like, you’ve got retreats, you’ve got one-on-one coaching, you’ve got masterminds, you’ve got your book. Where do we send everyone to go, look for this stuff and also to hang out with you? Like a newsletter, social media.
Well, they can sign up. You know, I have a lot of giveaways. We are restructuring this month for a lot of freebies, a lot of downloads we’re creating. But they can go to danagrant.com where you can find my website. But I hang out mostly on Instagram. So it’s @therealdanagrant. And I love to answer my own messages. If they send me a private message and they’ve heard this, I’m gonna answer.
It might take me a couple of days sometimes, but I’m gonna answer that. I feel really compelled to do that. And you know, it is just that I think that connection of people want to be heard. And I don’t believe there’s any upmanship. And I just again taught this at a keynote. I believe in having the round table of having us, there’s equality in women connecting and listening to women instead of you know staying in a green room and that is I had the opportunity to sit with the people and have a beautiful room that we connected in. And it was so I’m still thinking about it, a week later.
You know, it’s like wow, that was powerful. And it was so full of connection and transformation. Then the big rooms where I’m in the green room and I come out and then I’m leaving. It’s being of service. That’s what I’m here to do. I told God I’m gonna pay it forward the rest of my life. And I took that commitment very seriously. And that’s I’m not gonna betray myself on that. I’m not going to and I think that when we betray ourselves is where we need to slow down around and why we do it.
That is so powerful. What a great way to close this out, but I’m not letting you off the hook, Dana.
Well, we’re gonna add to that. If that was good, we’re gonna say, yeah, this. This will be my final thing on that. Because I want people to know that they’re never gonna have a more intimate relationship with anyone than themselves. And we never consider ourselves in the equation. Get to know what you’re what you want.
A lot of times when people, what do you want? Oh, I don’t know. It’s not uncommon when people come to me, they don’t have a friggin’ clue of what they want. They don’t know. They don’t need to know. We’re gonna figure that out together. And I think as leaders and as coaches, we hold space for all the dreamers, all the expansion.
And by asking those questions, they start to, you can see it, even that evolution, that movement. What’s possible, where they step back, what’s not possible. It’s an ebb and flow. It’s an ebb and flow process. It totally is.
Final words. Final action step. Share that.
Oh. That was you dropped right in. So I’m going to say what came to me. Don’t isolate yourself. Don’t let shame or anything in your life not let you show up in your full power. I don’t, I think, reach out, ask for help, and share in a safe place. Find somebody. You know, it doesn’t have to be me or you. Find someone that you can share that you trust. Trust is important. That you can share something with because secrets are killing you. Your secrets are killing you.
My secrets were killing me, literally. No one knew about that medicine. No one knew I was sick, but they had no idea what I was going through. You know, and the first time I told that, you know, hundreds of women waited in line to talk to me about it, about their own story and their aunt and their sister. And can I please help? And I had no idea that by sharing, and I was terrified of the first stage I was on. What are they gonna think of me? I’m exposing everything. I’m so vulnerable. Get vulnerable. That is where your growth is.
Put the armour down, be willing to feel that vulnerability, that connection with another person that sees you clearly and loves you and wants the best for you. And isn’t saying, oh my God, I knew something was up. I got that too. But it didn’t make me retract. I just said, that’s so interesting. I wonder what your story is.
I wonder what your story is. What a great way to end, Dana. Oh my God. What a pleasure. You know, I have been interspersing questions throughout this narrative that you’ve been sharing because what you’ve had to share has just been so profound that I just wanted you to keep downloading throughout this conversation, and that’s exactly what you did.
Thank you so much for your light, for your story, for your, you know, for your raw honesty, for your wisdom. It’s it, you know, I know that you’ve given us a lot to think about, a lot of insights. You’ve reminded us that we don’t need permission to trust our timing or speak our truth or expand you know, without apology.
Thank you for that. Honestly, I mean that. And please come back on. Like I feel like we have so much more to talk about.
Oh, we do. We do. Thank you for having me. I love your energy. Your questions were deep and wide and I appreciate that. You know, this was a great conversation. I loved your energy connecting with you. And thank you so much for having me. And I hope, I hope that we reach people that can mirror back and say, I’m changed because of this. I’m making different decisions because of this.
And you know, my desire is that if this has touched anyone that’s listening to this, watching this, reading this, I want you to go and do the thing that you know instinctually you’ve been called to do. So whether that is connecting with Dana, whether that is grabbing her book, whether that is something else that you feel you need to do, just action it. That’s what we ask, right, Dana?
Just take action on it. And I love that statement that you made – put a stake in it. You know, I’m gonna be using that for my own affirmations. Like Raj, put a stake in it, own it, and do the work.
In the beginning, I thought I had to do all the work because there was a worthiness issue—constantly asking myself, ‘Are you enough?’ It’s exhausting to the soul.
And say it out loud. Declare it. Let the universe come in. You don’t have to do it alone. You stack courage, but that one thing you can do today. We can all do one thing today. We can all do one thing. We can speak something out into existence of what you want or what you choose not to do.
But I’m saying if you’re focused on the negative and the lack and the scarcity, you’re only creating more of that. If I’m focused on the abundance, even if I can’t see it, I’m trusting the invisible, it will appear.
Yeah.
Yes.
Absolutely. Amen to that. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I absolutely adore you, Donna. And you know, I just keep being you. I just love you that you are.
Thank you. Thank you. Oh, love the conversation.
Likewise, likewise. And guys, as always, if this conversation resonated with you, which I absolutely know it did, please share it with someone who needs to hear it. And remember, confidence isn’t a mask or armour. It’s a muscle that requires us all to work out and to feed it. You know, just please do that for you or for someone else in your world that you know that you can help. And you know, do that thing that you think is impossible because it truly is possible if you decide that it is.
And from my perspective, folks, I will see everyone next time with another insightful episode, just like this one. Transform Your Confidence, the podcast folks, you can go hangout with us on YouTube at The Open Chest Confidence Academy. You can also go to The OpenChestConfidenceAcademy.com to sign up for our freebies, our free newsletter. Be a part of our community.
And please stay connected with us on our socials at @The Open Chest Confidence Academy and theopenchestconfidenceacademy.com website where you can find out different ways that you can work with me and our team. See you next time.
And as always, I’ll see you next time. Take care of yourself.
