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How to Communicate to Create Meaningful Connections with People Who Don’t Know You, With Kass Thomas

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Raj Girn: My guest today is communications and connection consultant and bestselling author of two books — one of them being ‘Seven Steps to Flawless Communication’ which I want to deep dive — Kass Thomas.

Here is our conversation:

Raj Girn: Thank you so much for enjoying the time with me because I know that that’s exactly what’s going to happen. Welcome to the show.

Kass Thomas: Thank you so much. I love that you are a futurist. Thank you it is a pleasure to be here.

Absolutely. Folks Kass is also a certified facilitator of access consciousness. And her second book, for any of you who are interested and you should be and I know you will be by the time we get to the end there, is called ‘Dancing with the Riches.’ Cass, there’s so much that I want to talk to you about.

But what I want to do is I want to preface a lot of what you’re doing today by how you got here. Your story is very eclectic in terms of the amount of different industries and career paths that you’ve had, but all of them have had kind of one common denominator, which is really learning to communicate with ease, purpose and practice.

Can you share some of your career highlights, some of the things that you’ve learned regarding being able to communicate in a meaningful way? I really feel that that’s a great place for us to start, and then I want to go into the books and also your program.

Kass Thomas, Credit: [email protected]

All right. Thank you so much. Yes. And, you know, sometimes we are having different careers, having different experiences, living in different places, working in different atmospheres and we don’t actually see what the connection is to everything that we do. So thank you so much for identifying that. And I was waiting for that, for the response.

When you said there’s something that connects them all, I was like, “What is that? What is that?” And you’re absolutely right. You know, one of the things for me is that I actually see the potential in everyone. I used to say I actually see who they truly are. But sometimes what we’re doing, and who we are pretending to be, is not connected with who we truly are.

“One of the things for me is that I actually see the potential in everyone. I used to say I actually see who they truly are. But sometimes what we’re doing, and who we are pretending to be, is not connected with who we truly are.” ~Kass Thomas

So in all of the careers and all of the jobs and all of the countries and cities that I’ve worked and lived in, one of the things that for me is vital to recognize — and I talk about this in the Seven Steps book — is that we all live here on planet Earth and we’re actually doing this recording on Earth Day.

Right.

And so if you are really connected and know that you have so much in common, there’s so much more that unites us with other people and where we call home, which is this world. This earth is the home of everyone. And you never feel detached.

You know what I mean? You never feel detached from yourself. And you also know that there’s got to be something unique and different about you. One little thing. And if it’s something that you have, everyone has that. So the way you approach people is different depending on where they’re coming from, what’s going on in their world, where they live, what their perspective is on life.

And that’s something that all of these careers — hotel industry, journalism, theater, television and film festivals and sales and marketing or television series in Italy, France and the United States, all of these places. There’s so much that is common with people that if you’re willing to see things from their perspective, then you know exactly how it is that they can even receive the word hello.

I don’t know if you know, some people have certain — it’s not really a religion, it’s a culture — that they don’t like to shake hands. So that’s not the way that you say hello to them. Some people kiss on both cheeks. Some people say ciao, which means hello and goodbye. So just being willing to have clarity about what you would like to communicate with people, how we would like that to go, and be willing to do whatever it takes to get people to engage with you in a way that creates a flow. Does that make sense?

It makes total sense. It actually is really a great preface into my next question. Kass, all these experiences that you’ve had with these countries you’ve lived in, all these industries you’ve worked in and through, I want to ask you this: What is the most valuable lesson that you’ve learned about the power of effective communications?

That you can’t get it wrong. You can’t get you wrong. You know, it may not turn out immediately the way you were hoping it would. The way people respond to you may seem like criticism. However, it is probably simply the way that they communicate, the way they get their point across.

So what is vital to know is that nobody knows you better than you. You’re the one that has your job and you don’t have to be feel badly or wrong. But you can be sorry if the way you were communicating with someone doesn’t work for them. You know, and it’s different. I’m sorry not for being who I am. I’m sorry if it doesn’t work for you. You know what I mean? And so I hope that responds, at least initially to your question.

Yes, it does. Kass. And there’s something very interesting about what you said there that I hope people picked up on and I want to just mention it, and that is communications is a lot about this marriage between not letting who you are be lost, but not overpowering that so that the other person feels like they can’t step into their authentic self. And what you just said, there is a beautiful way to make sure that you stay strong and firm in a loving way to who you are, but also allow the other person to be able to be welcomed into an exchange of that communication.

“The communications is a lot about this marriage between not letting who you are be lost, but not overpowering that so that the other person feels like they can’t step into their authentic self.” ~Raj Girn

You have taught and trained so many people around the world and you continue to do so and you’ve been doing so for a long time. So I really want to pick your brain on a few things now that you are sitting with me in an hour. You know, some things that a lot of my clients have also come to me with.

What are some pointers that you can share about how to go from being considered a “bad communicator” to a great one? Now, I know that you’ve just said that there is no such thing as bad communication and what you’ve been talking about right now. But if we were to look at some people that don’t get the purpose of communication is to create some sort of a two way relationship with the person that you’re speaking to. I would perceive that if I may as “bad communication.”

Talk to me from your experience when you’ve had people that have come to you that haven’t quite gotten there, where they understand that the communication between two people is actually what is communication. How do you help them step into that? And because that really is needed to be able to become effective in communications as you journey through any kind of program or any kind of journey to being the best communicator you can be as an individual.

Absolutely. I love the questions. And let me preface. So thank you for that. And I did really listen to some things on YouTube that you were inviting people to recognize about communication. And the first thing that I would love to share is that it’s so much easier for us to communicate to other people. And just like you said, communication is a minimum of a two way street.

So when we’re communicating with people, often silence is a way to communicate with someone and to give them the room, the space, the time to actually share them. I remember when I traveled in my early 20s in California. I was born and raised on the East Coast. It’s very different on the West Coast. And I was thinking, wow, they board these trucks much slower. And just I remember being with these producers at their house. They had done a film and I thought, okay, it must be time to go to sleep now, because we’ve just finished dinner and they’re not saying anything. But I waited and I enjoyed some silence with them. And what got launched? Them sharing their creations with me after that silence. You know what I mean? If I thought I had to do something or say something in order to open up that communication, then I would have bombarded them with everything. I thought it had to be communicating in a one way street.

Credit: @kassthomas.com

How powerful is what you just said there? Silence is also a very effective way to communicate. Folks, I hope you are taking heed. This is such a magical moment right here. Sorry I cut you off there, but I just I have to share with you that that is such a powerful statement and something that a lot of people don’t really sit well with.

They feel that when they’re silent that they’re not participating or they’re not being shown to engage. But your example right there is a great example of showcasing truly how it invites people to speak their truth and speak what it is that they’re looking to put out there because they’re not being pushed back by constant communication verbally from the other person. I love that.

Absolutely. And I’m going to just note here how you you didn’t cut me off, actually. You were engaging with me and you actually were creating some not silence, but some space so that people can actually absorb and hear perhaps and listen to what we’re saying. A lot of times we might bombard people with too much information.

And I as a child, I totally did that, inviting people to find the happiness that’s in them. You know, when you live in cold places like Canada, a lot of times people are locked in. So inviting people to come out and they did show their sunshine because they said, guess this kid is not going to stop so we might as well just give it up and be, you know. However, in traveling and working in different areas, not bombarding people is absolutely something.

What I wanted to respond, though, is that all communication starts with us people. What I was saying is that people find it so much easier to communicate with others and try and get their point across to others. But those moments of silence are sometimes very uncomfortable for people because what starts knocking at their door is not really comfortable, you know? And it may be some awareness. They have some knowledge, some wisdom, they have some information, they have something that is not in line with what they think they have to say or do.

“People find it so much easier to communicate with others and try and get their point across to others. But those moments of silence are sometimes very uncomfortable for people because what starts knocking at their door is not really comfortable.” ~Kass Thompson

So when we have that moment of 10 seconds of silence what comes to us may be something that is beyond our wildest imagination. We’re beyond our calculated way of communicating. But it’s the universe. It’s God, Allah, Buddha, Shiva, the angels, the stars, the animals, the trees, everything; everything that is contributing to who and what we are. And we’re a part of that.

So what I like to invite people to do, which is not always comfortable, with the seven steps I do, is first connect with you. And there’s a couple of ways to do that. Many ways. Some people do breathing exercises. Some people do meditation. Some people do mantras. Do whatever way works for you.

And when you’re connected with you then you know what is in line with your vibration. And so when you start recognizing that something is not working for you or something is not comfortable for you, and I love that you said this on YouTube, what are some of the questions you can ask that will give you more wisdom about it? Because when something is not comfortable, it may be the change that you’ve been asking for that is not common for you. That is not what’s going on just right now. But it may be a way that you can expand your business, your relationships, your ease in life and everything.

“When something is not comfortable, it may be the change that you’ve been asking for that is not common for you. That is not what’s going on just right now. But it may be a way that you can expand your business, your relationships, your ease in life and everything.” ~Kass Thompson

And kids are a great example of that because when they become teenagers that stretching of the body and the skin and the bones, it’s not comfortable, but they can’t stay little babies. They are going to continue the path in life. So that’s basically how it shows up. And sometimes it shows up emotionally.

But when you’re willing to connect with you and ask, this is a great access consciousness question, which I love. Instead of getting aggravated or annoyed or being unhappy with discomfort, ask, is this the change I’ve been asking for that’s showing up in a different way than I expected?

Can you say that again?

Is this the change I’ve been asking for showing up in a different way than I expected?  I’ve done a lot of talking about taking risks and people don’t want to take risks because they don’t want to fail. But you can’t fail. You can either win or learn something. So if you’re willing to really learn from your mistakes or what you consider a failure, then the next time you encounter that on a different scale you have a preparation that is beyond intelligence. It’s actually thanks to your experiences.

“If you’re willing to really learn from your mistakes or what you consider a failure, then the next time you encounter that on a different scale you have a preparation that is beyond intelligence. It’s actually thanks to your experiences.” ~Kass Thompson

Absolutely.

People are feeling like your question, that they’re not communicating well. Please know how to connect with yourself, know how to actually receive whatever the experience has shown you so that when you communicate with someone in the next round, you actually have additional information.

You said something that just keeps repeating in my head and I want to share it with you. And that’s this whole notion of failure. And I say this sometimes to some of my clients that just sit in that limiting beliefs failure mantra that they’ve decided to attach to themselves. What if that word just didn’t exist? What if that word just wasn’t in our vocabulary in any language? What if it didn’t exist in the dictionary?

How would you look at things that you know you perceived to be the journey that you’re on, but then ended up taking you in a different direction? What would the definition of that be? It would be life. It’d be learning. It’d be going to the purpose of your life’s journey. We would find other ways to look at that. I love that you shared that.

Absolutely. And that question. Just being willing to look at it. Well, obviously, something is showing up for me that I wasn’t expecting and it’s showing up in relationships with me. You know, first marriage ending. My 10-year career ending and not choosing to ignore it. You know, I talk about that in the Dancing with Riches book. When something shows up for you, you can choose door number one, door number two or door number three.

Door number one is going into the wrongness of you. “Oh, why did I do that? How many times in my life have I done that?” Like going down the rabbit hole. Door number two is “Oh, not sure what happened.” And ignoring it. Door number three is a question. “I wonder what else is possible here. I wonder how it gets any better than this. I wonder what this is going to create in my future.” And when you open that door number three, you have tons of possibilities from which you can choose. And sometimes it’s not an immediate choice.

When I changed careers . . . I was working in the hospitality industry and have won prizes. You know best concierge at five star hotels and everything.

I can believe that.

And I loved it. And then in six months that changed my life and lots of different changes in my life. But I had the chance to go into another hotel and work at an even higher level. And something was stopping me. It felt like a failure to not be able to go, to not be able to get in the taxi and go.

I’m so grateful that I was willing to have that silence or that space of six months that actually changed my life. Because I began traveling with a jazz singer. I was the tour manager for a jazz group for two years. Nnenna Freelon, they just got nominated again for a Grammy Award.

Oh, my gosh. That’s amazing.

Isn’t it amazing?

It really is.

And willing to allow the tweaks in your life to occur that can open up a space for you that I probably wouldn’t be here talking with you had that not happened over 20 years ago. And I moved from New York City a year and a half later to Rome in Italy.

And I opened up a television production company that I had never done before. And I was speaking English and French and Spanish at the time, opened up to Italian and met access consciousness and met Deepak Chopra, who I was buying all of his books in the States, but he came to Rome.

That’s incredible.

And working in television and meeting people from around the world. So what is the comfort level that we are actually trying to maintain that does not really get us out there in the world in a way that the world waiting for and it’s a contribution.

Absolutely. Let me ask you a little bit about both of your books. Let’s start with Seven Steps to Flawless Communication. What made you write this particular book?

Thank you for that question. Nobody has ever asked me that question.

Well, it’s the most fundamental question.

You know what? But that’s fundamental to you. And you get that. That’s your communication genius.

Thank you.

What made me write that book while I was working with Access Consciousness and getting books translated, I opened up the modality to different languages because living in Italy, I was like, “Let’s get this in Italian.” At least the books and working for a couple of years, just opening up different languages. Gary Douglas is the founder of Access and is a lovely, gentle, kind man. And he said, “You need to do write a book about communication.” And I said, “Why do I have to write a book about communication? Why do I have to write a book? We’ve got lots of books that talk about that.”

He said, “Yes, but the way you communicate is different.” And I said, “Well, if I talk about my communication. I didn’t study my undergraduate degree in mass communication, in broadcast journalism from NYU.” I said, “It’s not going to be exactly an Access book, even though I’m using so many of the tools.” He said “It doesn’t have to be anything. It doesn’t have to be access. It doesn’t have to be religious. It doesn’t have to be anything. It has to be from you what you can share with the world.”

So I said, okay. I started, you know, you go to university. I started doing all these studies and surveys and all this. It was going to be such a thick book and I was in Sicily with a girlfriend of mine helping her out with her concert performance. And I was preparing that every morning. Every morning. And one morning I woke up. And I started writing and I was like, “Why is this seven steps coming to me? And it actually just flowed out of me. It took me months and months, almost a year, to write this huge book. This came out of me into three months. It was August. By November the book came out in German, French and English.

Oh, my gosh. That was the book you were meant to write.

I know. And it was the seven easy, simple steps. I mean, it really is one page for each one. It’s got homework and milestones for people.

And so it’s like a workbook/knowledge book.

Absolutely.

I love those types.

It’s really easy. I love those types as well. It’s so simple that a lot of times we don’t like simplicity. We need things complicated because if they’re not complicated, there’s too much silence, it’s too much space. And we might have to listen to who and what is knocking on our door. But the simplicity of it allows people to approach many different areas in life, utilizing these really easy seven steps and I have about 27 steps teachers around the world in different languages.

The book is in 20 languages and they’re so amazing because even the way they approach the seven steps is delightful. And for me. So I’d love to do those seven steps to the exclusion classes to get people to engage with the way they communicate their unique brand of magic.

Seven steps to help you identify your narrative and how that parlays over into you experiencing the world is what I’m hearing you say. Am I right? 

Yes, absolutely. Connect with you. Recognize when you’re disconnected with you so that you can have a fast track to reconnect with you and others and establish true connection. Those are the four phases.

And this is what those seven steps help people to do. Are you able to quickly tell us what the seven steps are? But people need to go get the book, obviously. Are you able to share just what they would expect to get out of the movie?

Yeah, absolutely. The connect with you is sort of a tricky way to get you to connect with you. It’s so easy. The first step is show me the magic and it’s so easy for other people to notice what is unique and different and magical about us. But often we are not recognizing it about ourselves. So it’s asking you to look in the mirror, look up at the sun, the universe that God, our daughter, whatever you believe in your heart. Show me the magic. What’s unique and different about me that I may not be recognizing might do the same thing that everyone does.

Wake up and get out of bed in the morning. But how do I do it in a different way? And perhaps we judge that different way that we do it. Like you were saying, the way we talk with people or communicate with people, we’ve judged it as wrong or not nice. But what if you’re willing to look at it from a different perspective? What is it that you can see? So we do play with that a bit and then talk to your body as the second step. And that’s about your gut feeling, your intuition, your sixth sense so that you can know our bodies are like sensorial organisms.

So you will know when something is in line with your vibration, when something’s right for you, when it’s the moment to do something, when you’re willing, your gut feeling. I have a client who’s a bank manager and he was going for a new position and he’s great at a structured way of setting up things. But they said to him, “You don’t seem to have any connection with your intuition.” And he was like, “What is that?” To know how to adapt to change and in this particular two-year pandemic period, knowing how to adapt to change and knowing that change is the only constant.

So if you’re willing to actually talk with your body, not just at your body, why are you looking so old? Why are you so fat? What is it? Why aren’t you sleepy? Talking with your body and receiving information from your body. So there’s lots of different tools to play with. And once you’ve done that, you recognize when you’re disconnected.

Step three is about lowering your barriers and walls. How often do we go through emotion? How often do we get a really easy way for people to do that, just to do it actually physically to bring down those walls and barriers? And and once you’ve done it a few times, physically doing that, then it becomes quite easy and automatic. And it is a really interesting way to go beyond any mask or veil that you have on that you’re trying to be the way someone thinks you should be. Nobody does you better than you.

So that mask or veil, go beyond the veil is the fourth step. And it wasn’t actually totally clear to me what to put in that small one-page or two-page description until I went to China. I did a workshop in China with some amazing people, and then I did private sessions with them and they were beyond amazing in the private sessions. So that veil is like, now you see me, now you don’t. It’s like putting on a façade so the way you think you’re supposed to be. And so many people might even begin to recognize that there’s something missing in their life.

And they might even recognize that something is them or that someone is them. But they’ve been, probably since eight years old, trying to behave the way they’re supposed to behave that they might not even remember how to give back to them. So that’s why we start with that connecting phrase. And disconnecting when you’re behind a mask or a veil or having barriers up and when you recognize that you can reconnect with you by engaging with who you are.

Reconnect with people, engaging with who they are and different ways of doing that. Even though they told me I didn’t have to use the Access, I did use in the book one of these amazing Access tools, which is about creating energy flows. When other people are talking to you and they’re being pushy, or when other people are talking to you and they’re feeling needy and you’re feeling exhausted because they’re draining you, they really are demanding from you, how do you change the flow of that communication with them?

So using energy flows is great and engaging with anything and anyone and expanding your zone of awareness so that whatever the topic is and then whenever the response is, whatever the action is that is desired or required by a group of people, by a client, by a partner or by a family member, then you have an awareness about that. And so you can establish true connection, which is about, like I said before, connecting with the Earth at step seven. Step five is engaging the universe. Step six is expanding your zone or communicating with your furry and invisible friends and animals are amazing like that. And step seven is connecting with your friend. I love that we’re talking about this on Earth Day.

Serendipitous.

Yeah. When you connect with the Earth, then the way you walk, the way you talk is in line with your vibration, because your heartbeat is your rhythm. And when you are really connected with you, then you’re also recognizing what is that heartbeat that you have that is actually in rhythm with the heartbeat of the planet.

“When you connect with the Earth, then the way you walk, the way you talk is in line with your vibration, because your heartbeat is your rhythm. And when you are really connected with you, then you’re also recognizing what is that heartbeat that you have that is actually in rhythm with the heartbeat of the planet” ~Kass Thompson

I love all of that. How intriguing, guys. You know that you want this book Seven Steps to Flawless Communications. Where can people pick up this book? I know that it’s in 20 languages, which I mean, if that isn’t a good parlay into giving this as a gift to everyone I don’t know what is. Where can people pick up the book?

Well, lots of different places. The the printed book. I’m so grateful that AccessConsciousness.com/shop they’ve got a lot of them on there. The e-book people can get from my website KassThomas.com and Amazon has a lot of books on it too. A lot of the languages on it as well. So it’s in Hindi, Japanese, simplified Chinese. It’s in Polish, Portuguese, Spanish, Turkish.

And it’s so small. And it’s really one of the the things that I wanted. It’s no more than $12 or €10. And I didn’t let anyone increase the price because it’s a contribution to this world. The tagline of the book is there’s so much more that unites us than separates us.

And just like you were saying, I’ve been spending a couple of weeks in the United States, the first time in two and a half years I’ve been here. And just remembering who you are, what you are, what you have done and experienced in life, that it’s got you to where you are right now and allowing that to contribute to where you’re going to be going in the future.

Kass, your second book Dancing with The Riches. I have to ask you, it has such an interesting and intriguing title. Talk to me about this one.

Do you want me to sing you the song? No. Okay. I won’t.

Do you have a song associated with this?

“Dancing with the riches, there is no better way, dancing with riches each and every day.” Yes, it’s about laughing. And I think it’s awesome. And it’s almost like a guided meditation. The song, I’ve got to tell you. It’s great to listen to in the morning. I will share it with you as soon as we get this out there.

Dancing with Riches is an invitation for people to recognize what the riches, what the wealth, what the gifts, the gems and the jewels are of their life are. And yes, riches can be economic as well, but it’s what your talents and abilities and capacities are that maybe you have not acknowledged because of being bombarded by other situations coming up in life.

So there’s six chapters. It’s a how to book and it’s being in step with the energy of change, using the Access Consciousness tools. And so it’s about the relationship with yourself and how that is showing up and how we’ve been . . . It’s so interesting how sometimes we are continuously in self judgment.

Well, I think we are subconsciously trained to be that way because of the infrastructures in society that we’re brought up to feel like we need to participate in. Like we’re put into this way of living and a part of that. Is this what you’re saying?

Absolutely. And I loved listening to you talk about that. Anybody who has to talk about that on YouTube, please go visit and thank you. It’s really lovely. And it’s a gift. It’s truly a gift. And our relationship with ourselves and the maybe going into self judgment, this is what I want to say. Ninety-nine per cent of what comes into our mind is about us picking up on what other people are feeling and thinking.

Have you ever thought about somebody and then they called you or you found a message from them and you’re like, “Oh, my gosh, I was just thinking about you. I can’t believe you wrote me.” Were you thinking about them or were they thinking about you and you picking up on that? You know what I mean?

So we have this capacity and it’s important to recognize. But anyway, the first chapter, it’s about your relationship with yourself. And it gives lots of examples from my life and inviting people, if this shows up for use this tool. If this shows up for you use this tool. If anything like this shows up for you in your relationship, use this tool.

I love that.

Oh, it’s great. It’s a how-to book. It’s really inviting people to dance, be in rhythm, even if you are not physically moving, to be in rhythm with the vibration of your riches. There is so many kings and queens in this world and they may be on the street begging for money. But if they’re willing to access the light inside of them and allow it to shine out, it can and will be a gift to themselves and to other people as well. So the first chapter is about your relationship with self and it’s quite long because it all starts with us, right?

Absolutely. And that is the the core journey that we’re all on as individuals. Everything else just comes in and out of the flow of who we are and as determining who that’s going to be and what our service is going to be to ourselves. And if that service is going to include the human, include humanity.

And oftentimes people feel that it needs to be both. But I honestly feel that for some people, they’re on this journey to to serve others. A lot of that comes up in pop culture of the last 10 years. But I honestly feel, Kass, that the best journey that you can be on is the one that you’re on with yourself, which is exactly what both your two books in different ways talks about. If you could at least get that journey right the rest of what you do, the service to humanity in any capacity, be it regional, local, international, I think is an extra step that if that is your calling, it’s wonderful.

But I don’t feel it’s something that we should feel that we need to step into because pop culture’s telling us that we should, because if every individual wants to look after themselves, we’d be in a very different place today on Mother Earth.

Absolutely. And talk about self. And that is not always an easy topic for people because it’s so much easier to look outside of you than to look inside it. Chapter two is about the body. If you could see this picture. My brother sent me a picture of me and my dad. I think I was 21 at the time. I had never seen that body. I had never seen that gorgeous, sexy body. And it wasn’t until I started working with the systems, gaining a little weight, that I was willing to actually let myself be seen. And a guy said to me once, a friend of mine, he said, “Wow, you put on some weight. You look great.” And it was like, wait a minute, that’s an oxymoron, isn’t it?

Or is it?

No, it’s like being willing to be seen. So your relationship with your body and then the ways that things feel inside your body, the sensations you get in your body that actually represent what’s going on around you. And if this shows up in this way, use this, too. If this happened this week here’s five tools to use. Pick whichever one works for you. And so really giving people a flow with that.

And the third chapter is about relationships with others and lots of examples and just giving people some ways to change those the way they feel about their relationships. Like you said, start with you and then change it.

And the fourth chapter is about money. You know, dancing with riches and our rapport with money. The fifth chapter is about business, so how it works. And the sixth chapter is like two pages of something. It’s about, are you living life with a purpose? Because sometimes when we life with a purpose and we reach that purpose, is it over? What do we do?

So are you living life purposefully? So, yeah. So what you were saying is so absolutely right about people are here. We’re all here to be a contribution to the Earth. Otherwise we could be on Mars on our own. You know what I mean? But we’re here on planet Earth. So if you are wanting to nourish others to fill your cup up with water, allow that water to overflow in your cup so that what you are gifting to others is always fresh. Right? Not the stale water you have in your half cup. And and a lot of times with the cup half empty, the cup half full. And if you were gifting to others without first filling your cup up, once your cup is empty, all those people that you could have contributed to, you can’t anymore because you’re on empty.

So please continually fill you up so that your overflow is enriched with the abundance that you’re capable of gifting, not only to others, but first and foremost to you.

I love your analogy of the cup half full versus half empty versus overflowing, and how that can really be translated into how we should live. Wasn’t that something in the Bible that my cup overflow as Lord? There was something in the Bible about that and I feel a lot of us don’t really understand what that even means. And you just said it beautifully.

If your cup isn’t overflowing, you’re not replenishing the cleanliness and the purity and the sanctity of the water, i.e. the life force of you, because you’re stagnating your growth potential. It’s beautiful. And there’s a million other different ways that this can be looked at. Thank you so much for sharing that. I mean, it just reminded me of something I read in the Bible. I hope I got it right. And it was from the Bible. I feel instinctually that that’s where I read it.

If your cup isn’t overflowing, you’re not replenishing the cleanliness and the purity and the sanctity of the water, i.e. the life force of you, because you’re stagnating your growth potential.” ~Raj Girn

My intuition, my step to the wisdom is telling me absolutely if and how many times and then how many different ways do we need to hear something? Access Consciousness, the tagline on that is empowering people to know.

So many things are in power trying to empower us, giving us information. But it’s empowering people to know that they know. And I love it because it’s not the answer. Right? It’s the question. And once you ask someone a question, they will receive. They’re knowing their answer to their life, right?

Absolutely.

That’s in the Bible, too.

Yes, it is.

And you shall receive. Where, do we see it?

Right.

Ask and you shall receive. Next page.

Absolutely. And the receive is your perception of what is being received. It’s not what is being delivered from the other person. And that’s the other part of this. It brings us all back to communication. Brings us back to just what we’re talking about here. Before I move on and get ready to round things off, I want to ask you this: Is this second book also available in all the places that you mentioned before?

I just want to make sure people have the opportunity because I feel that one is like your ground zero space and the other one then goes into a specific focus point that you can build off of the first books. I just want to make sure that everyone watching, listening or reading this has access to knowing where to go pick up these two books.

They’re all on Amazon.

Let’s tell everybody one more time your website URL.

Right. It’s a strange name. It’s KassThomas.com.

There you go. Your name dot com.

That’s it.

Absolutely. You mentioned something in your second book that I want to just bring up as we get ready to close out. And it’s the whole business side of things, one of the most difficult skills to learn. And the fact is the art of communicating in a meaningful way that draws people to you, especially if they don’t know who you are, that’s a very difficult challenge.

And I feel that everything that we’ve talked about, your two books are ways in which people can find methodology and the mindset around that and the action steps around being able to know how to do that. What in your experience teaching just this to Access Consciousness, your books, your own program, what would you say you found to be some benchmarks in getting this dialed in the right way, the Kass Thomas Way?

Before coming out with the book, people were asking me to do a business class, to do something on on business and money. And I did about six years ago. My first workshop, Dancing with Riches. It was so clear to me. It’s a four module workshop that I’ve been doing for six years. It’s so different than anything because I’m inviting people to see and it’s is the different way and approach they have to creating projects, expanding their current business and engaging with other people in business.

And it’s in four modules. Sometimes it’s two days, sometimes it’s four weeks, once a week with things in between. But what I would like people to see is what it is you’re convinced comes easy to you. And so you’re really great at that. And then I like to put them in a role that they’re not comfortable with, that they’re sure that they’re not great at, and to engage with someone else’s project in these set modules in a role that they’re not comfortable in.

And what it does is it helps the person whose project we’re looking at in that particular module, because the way you’re going to ask a question that gives you the tools you need to be in a role you don’t like. You’re like, “Okay, fine. If I’m going to do customer service, this is what I really need to know.” And it’s so helpful for the person whose project it is because they’ve never thought of that. And it’s also helpful for them to recognize how many more talents they have never considered.

And so people really have taken off after these Dancing with Riches workshops. They’ve always taken off with a new project or a project that they thought that they felt stuck in, but they get clarity on it. So it’s really about recognizing the riches of your life and being willing to choose what is it that brings you joy. What is it that brings you ease? What is fun for you? Because we’re not here just to work. We’re not here just to be in relationships. We’re here to enjoy life.

Yes.

So Dancing with Riches is many different ways in different areas of your life, the book that you can enjoy a bit more and Dancing with Riches the workshop is always different because different people come with different projects and when they come, they start with, this is my business and this is what I would like to expand on.

When it’s midway, they’re like, “You know what? I’d like to actually explore a different project because it’s now getting connected with you and knowing what is the project, the business that I would like to start, that I would enjoy, and my joy would bring joy to not only my bank account, but also to the people with whom I engage.”

It’s a very different energy when you’re even on airlines, when the company is really being a contribution to the employees. The way they engage with you makes you choose that company. I love flying Delta. I got to tell you, I loved flying Alitalia. It doesn’t exist anymore, but they’re just so much of a gift. They’re just so gentle and kind and joyful. Why? Because they’re actually dancing with the riches of their life.

Is there anything at all that you feel that we haven’t touched upon today, that you feel people need to know about today’s topic, which is the title of the show: How to Communicate to Create Meaningful Connections with People Who Don’t Know You? Your last and final words?

Absolutely. The simplicity of flawless communication starts with you. Connect with you. Recognize when you’re disconnected from you. Don’t go into judgment. Find the path back to you so that you can reconnect with yourself, with others, with nature, and with the world. And you will be dancing with the riches of your life.

“The simplicity of flawless communication starts with you. Connect with you. Recognize when you’re disconnected from you. Don’t go into judgment. Find the path back to you so that you can reconnect with yourself, with others, with nature, and with the world. And you will be dancing with the riches of your life.” ~Kass Thompson

Amen to that. What an absolute pleasure this has been. What an insightful conversation, Kass. You are such a beautiful soul.

Thank you so much for taking time out of your vacation and having this conversation with me that I know genuinely is going to help a lot of people out there because communications mindset is something that’s so difficult to cultivate unless we start with self. And that’s really what this entire conversation has been about.

If anyone out there wants to hang out with you, where should we send them?

Well, I’m in Georgia at the moment. But if you’re interested in hearing a little bit more about communication join me. I do free Zoom calls every first of the month, every seventh of the month, something free online to give people a little bit of an introduction.

And of course if you don’t want to talk to other people and just want private sessions, all of that I do. But please have a look at the book and see if it speaks to you and is now the time to create the change in your life that the world is asking for?

Ah, beautiful way to close out Kass. Again, if people want to do any of these Zoom calls or even the program that you talked about earlier on, is this all on your website?

Absolutely. Just sign up and you will get some communication or [email protected] or [email protected]

Are you on social?

I’m on social. The Art of Being Cass Thomas on Facebook.

And I love that.

Kass Thomas coaching on Instagram and also LinkedIn, of course, Kass Thomas.

Kass, thank you so much. I really thank you for all your insights. There’s so much to unpack there, guys. I really hope that you got some real value from today’s show, and I know that you did because there’s just so much there for you to actually glean from. I want you to please share with everyone you know who you feel need today’s insights. I want you to share this with them. Please do that. And here’s some ways that you can do that.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel on The Open Chest Confidence Academy. So this way you’ll never miss any of the episodes that we drop on. We drop them every Wednesday, guys. Also, you can hop on over the podcast platforms. You know, whatever you’re on, you just need to search and download ‘The Transform Your Confidence Show.’ So please do that.

And I say this every single time we close out a show. If you’re anything like me and you prefer to do a read and a bookmark and just easily be able to go back to the episodes that really speak to you or that you want to share with others, just hop on over to our website, theopenchestconfidenceacademy.com/media/podcast.

Every single week when we close off, I always feel the sense that it’s been a very powerful episode, that it’s been an episode that has allowed me to stay true to my intention, to all of you, and that is to provide you with knowledge that’s actionable, that’s real, that, you know, gives you some indication of perhaps where you might need to really up your game and dial into some professional development, which I feel is an ever lasting journey for all of us. I really hope that you’ll come back next week. Tell everyone you know. You know that I love you guys, and I thank you so much for your support. I’ll see you next week.

To contact Kass Thompson: Web, LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube

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